1. |
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i keep hiding from everyone
then wondering why i'm lonely
i keep mulling over trauma
then wondering why i'm sad
now it's late
but i can't sleep
i need to see a friend
or i'll stay up
in agony
swatting thoughts
swarming in my head
i keep drinking myself to sleep
then wondering why i can't wake up
i keep overeating cheap food
then wondering why i feel dead
i get no rest
i wake up more
beat than the day before
i worry that
in 5 years of this
i won't be able to wake
anymore
i don't know why i sabotage myself
i know that i know better than that
it's just that in the moment i forget
every single moment of my life
i keep doing the same old shit
that keeps me in a nosedive
i can't break the habit
to save my life
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2. |
Good Friend (demo)
03:22
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double trouble
is a triple threat
spellbound since the day we met
in a coma
machine takes my breath
flip the switch
toward death
you win again
or did i let you
to make amends?
you were a good friend
but all good things
come to an end
i am under
the power that you hold
over me like a lease
beg your pardon
could i be so bold
ask you please to release
you win again
did i let you
to make amends?
you were a good friend
but all good things
come to an end
watching myself get replaced
by an upgraded prettier face
always knew i was a disappointment
now i have the evidence
you win again
did i let you
to make amends?
you were a good friend
but all good things
come to an end
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3. |
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I don’t know how to be a human
I was never really taught
I got no invites to orientation
I guess they just forgot
I don’t know how to be a human
Musta been born something else
I think I was once a happy nautilus
But got plucked from my shell
Outside my window
Life carries on
Does anyone know
When it’s all done?
I don’t wanna be a human
Jellybean smushed under the weight
Of the pressure of remaining conscious
Like an infant kept awake too late
I want to be a brand new breed
Some critter no one’s been before
The missing link that science needs
To get us up off of all fours
For science
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4. |
Softboi Sobstory 1k
02:49
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I was doing wonders
At not thinking of you
Punched my head
Each time I failed
Til I saw you in the bruise
Could you call your ghouls off
Please un-sick your hounds
They shadow me like anxiety
Invisibly bearing down
No you won’t relent
Let up on the torment
I feel I’ve served my time
In the cell of my mind
I been touching myself
To the memory
Of you grasping for my love
While I pushed you away
Like some food I wouldn’t eat
If I could time travel
I’d go back and kiss you
Tell you what you mean to me
Now that I miss you
Have you moved on yet
Am I regret
Would you take me back if you could
Exchange me for something good
I can’t forget you
So I can’t just let you
Float off into some rainbow
Where I can’t follow
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5. |
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I shouldn’t’ve stayed home tonight
Should be with friends
I’m rummaging through my mind
Tangled in loose ends
I’m trying to make them make some sense
Nobody here to interrupt
I’m home alone
I’ve never been this fucked up
Dive into the unknown
I’m trying to drown my sorrow
Hands cradle head
Migraine regret
Massaging my skull
Knocked loose a bolt
Sun shines gray
On a hangover holiday
I’m off of work tomorrow
Today I’m a slag
I could be off a whole lot more
If I had no job...
I’m trying to live on holiday
Tell everyone an alibi
A valid excuse
While living an elaborate lie
A pathetic ruse
I’m trying to hide that I’m refuse
Make up events
To bail out on friends
Then use those friends
To bail on events
I’m everywhere
Yet I am thin air
While I’m away
On a hangover holiday
I’m goin’ on a booze cruise
I know that if I snooze, I lose
I’m goin’ on a booze cruise
I know that if I snooze I lose
I’ve already lost
So put the cost
On my tab
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6. |
Slink (electro mix)
05:29
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Always introspective
Walking back home
Parties leave me pensive
Walking back home
I guess you get what you pay for
And that's the cost of a halcyon time
C’mon brighten my door
I'm on my final dime
Already reminiscing
Walking back home
Feel like somethin's missing
Walking back home
Slinking past bawdy revelers
Sauntering off to the next good time
C’mon sweep me along
I’m on my final dime
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7. |
Guess I Like U (DX7 mix)
03:05
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i know it sounds stupid
a tired cliche
but some asshole cupid
is aimin my way
been tryin to dodge it
his heat seekin dart
but it's firmly lodged in
the heart of my heart
i guess i like u
(despite my better judgement)
i guess i like u
(i concede begrudgingly)
it's not in yr pictures
tho those sure don't hurt
it's not in the mixture
of the sun & yr skirt
it's in how u talk
the way u say things
i'm dumbstruck in awe
of how u think
i guess i like u
(i wouldn't, i swore)
i guess i like u
(can't deny it anymore)
i didn't wanna feel this way again
if it was gonna only curtly end
but u knocked me out cold
i'm down 4 the count, u win
just fucken kiss me
now u have me pinned
i guess i like u
(love's a better word)
i guess i love u
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8. |
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Cast you from my conscience
Like a guilt that weighs me down
Sever all the anchors
Keeping my mouth in a frown
Spewing new promises
To make up for ones you broke
You're just backpedaling
So you don't get snared in the spokes
You need pills
To feel whole
A black hole
Wishing well
Shot glass half
Full of hell
I tried to kick your habit
Tried to make you see the light
But you preferred the blackout
Of analgesic anthracite
We made love in a graveyard
On a weathered-blank headstone
Like we were christening
Your dream destination home
You need pills
To feel whole
A black hole
Wishing well
Shot glass half
Full of hell
Feel like a wishing well
Caught in a draught
Blind faith leading
All-seeing doubt
Unequally yoked
And the fields are unplowed
I'm unwhole
A dry well
Stained glass full
Of fresh-mulled hell
I am null
A broken spell
Free of my pull
I wish you well
Can’t wish you whole
I’ll wish you well
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9. |
Rewind (lo-res demo)
04:36
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Accept this gift basket
Of my sincerest apologies
Another IOU to redeem
When I have the means
For now just let it slide
The downside of ride or die
Once I recall
Where I fit in
I will renounce
Where I have been
Retrace missteps
Cover my sins
I’ll take the time to rewind
Look sharp for sundry flak
Friendly fire from shooting myself down
I’ll preemptively backtrack
Just to note the mines I’m laying around
Hopscotch with deadly stakes
Race with a crash for brakes
Once I recall
Where I fit in
I will renounce
Where I have been
Retrace missteps
Cover my sins
I’ll take the time to rewind
Employ some slight of brain
To recast the last couple hours
Convolved legerdemain
To conjure sweetness from the sour
Ritualistic majick
It always does the trick
Once I recall
Where I fit in
I will renounce
Where I have been
Retrace missteps
Love covers sins
I’ll take the time to rewind
Once we come to
All will make sense
Hearty relief
Sweet recompense
Tension dissolved
Into past tense
Let’s take the time to unwind
When I come to
I will repent
Ruin the mood
Being penitent
Beg you to name
The required sacrement
I would stop time to rewind
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10. |
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i'm alive
and i'm miserable
trashed guy
at the superbowl
shoveling dirt
in your open casket
wet blanket
in your picnic basket
looks like it's gonna rain
on your parade, hurray
looks like there's no cake
on your birthday, celebrate
i'm the demon
in the details
i'm the parasite
in your entrails
i suck the wind
from your sails
i pluck your sea
dry of whales
mice & men's
best laid plans
i make them fail
looks like your silver lining
just blew away, no way
looks like the government's
making off with your 401k
oh no
i am your bully
i'm just a fact of life
i'm your worst nightmare
just a part of growing up
i'm the antagonist
of your story
like death & taxes
you can't cheat me forever
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11. |
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bernie sanders
i'm a fan of yours
since '99
i watched you
spittin' fire on the news
felt like you were speakin' my mind
oh bernie
i've wanted you to run
since i was too damn young
to even vote
bernie sanders
you're the planter
of the seeds
of future revolution
in world that
makes any sense
you're the president
not another damn Clinton
oh bernie
you're my first real heartbreak
and i've been engaged
to the wrong person
oh bernie
please say it's just a prank
can't fan the revolt's flames
with the firemen watching
oh bernie
fuck the R & DNC
fuck Trump, and Hillary
they're two of a kind
hey bernie
show solidarity
with the independent party
go run with jill stein
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Spooky Mulder Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania
trustno1 (except us for all yer fringe pop music)
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